Friday, March 20, 2009

Mind Please Work!

Mind please work!

I need to either write or sleep. I should do both. I feel like a failure because I haven't done either yet. I s'pose I'll just write my paper tomorrow.

My brain just won't set down the facts right now.

So I think I'll go to sleep and just get up at 6am to write. Hmm.

I'm momentarily feeling very, very homesick. But when I return, I know things won't be the same. I'll probably blog on this later when I have time.
Yet, at the same time, I don't want this semester to end. I don't want to leave this community - this learning.
Really, it's me who will have changed when I go home. I don't know if Nova will fit into Sarah's life. She's a different girl. She used to be Sarah, and she cares about much of what Sarah cared about, but she's not the same Sarah she used to be.

I have no idea where the next few years will take me. I have no clue how God will change me. I confess I'm a tad bit frightened - frightened not because I am afraid for my welfare, but because I can't see ahead. But I know that God won't let me go. I haven't the slightest idea of what is to come, but His Name will still be on me nonetheless and He is Truth, even when I can't see it clearly.

Anyway. Order for the evening: Shower, Pray, Sleep.
Goodnight.

5 comments:

Nicholai said...

well people here will just have to change to fit the new Sarah! Don't be afraid of coming home Sarah

Snap said...

Hope you sleep well. Sleep does amazing things to overloaded brains.

Everything *will* be different when you get back. Things have changed quite a bit down here as well, but that is just part of life. Even if you had stayed at home life would still be different than it was four short months ago. I am so glad you were given the oppurtunity to study in such a great environment, even though it is rather far from home. Can't wait 'till you come back.

elizabeth said...

yeah. i hear you. i still like to know what my future will be. it is hard to be present and live there and trust God!

i think part of growing up and becoming an adult (what ever that may be) is changing ... i found that my late teens and twenties were a time of varied and at times intense inward change ... but as long as God is drawing us towards the changes then all is well.

personally i am glad i am not who i was ten years ago...

treasure this time; savour it. you will be home and far from here before you know it and for a time, you will miss it here. love to you! :)

Annalise said...

Sarah, hope you feel better.
Everything will (as snap stated) be different. It is different for me even.

sarahlaughed said...

Hey, Thanks all.

Yeah, we all change. Nothing is constant but Christ.